My Beloved pen

Night comes
Silence surrounds me
A sense of peace
The only thing which
makes me feel alive
is the powerful rhyme
of my poetry

I try to shut down thoughts
I try to block emotions
As an insane
I keep doing things to divert my mind
I am afraid that if i dont
the painful memories and thoughts
will empower my strength

Hours pass by
There is an emotional need
A physical need
A spiritual need
to be held tight
so all pain disappear
for a tiny moment

Is this need for
my mother
my father
my sisters
my friends
my soul mate
I dont know

I just know it has been there
for many many many years
And that I wont feel fulfilled
untill this feeling is gone
I close my eyes
Breath deeply
And try to be one
with my beloved pen